order a pizza and when the delivery guy shows up act confused and ask whos it for, and when the delivery guy says your name just say “adam?….. adam doesnt live here anymore. he died exactly 10 years ago after he ordered a pizza. is this some kind of sick joke?” start crying, take the pizza and close the door before they even get a chance to ask you for the money. you now have a free pizza. congratulations.
However my 3 year old brother was like way more excited than I was.
He was all “HARREH”
Then I proceeded to open Louis and I died a little because he was so haPPY
HES LIKE MY OWN LITTLE LARRY SHIPPER I JUST CANT DEAL
Then out came Zayn… he likes to call him “Dave”
“Ellie, can I look at their butts?” YES YOU CAN VINNY YOU DO WHATEVER YOUR LITTLE HEART DESIRES
omg he is the cutest thing
THIS. NEEDS. MORE. NOTES.
when i was in fourth grade we were doing a math lesson and all of a sudden the teachers like “have you ever seen a pregnant bird” and everyones jsut like “no” and then she slams her hand on the table and screams “THATS BECAUSE THEY DONT EXIST” AND ONE KID IN THE BACK JUST BLURTS OUT “WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH MATH”
my suicide note is literally just gonna be this text post